mommyhood: first few weeks on the job

Happy Mother’s Day!!!

gorgemess

So as it turns out being the caretaker to a newborn ain’t easy, seeing as neither of you know what the hell he wants (is there an app for that yet??).

People don’t like to tell you the truth about the first few weeks, simply claiming they “forgot” as it was blurred by the bliss and miracle of this new angel (insert eyeroll)… I’m thinking it’s simply a front made to protect you from any premature fear.

And I’m not here to burst any bubbles, I in love with our lil dude… but let’s get real. Assuming you had any kind of life before, this is one hell of an adjustment.

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SIDENOTE:
If you’re toying with the idea of a baby, make sure you’ll have TIME and INFINITE amounts of patience. Or marry a billionaire and have a Mary Poppins team.

Things to Expect:

You will contemplate suicide within the first week. Probably in the…

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